The Battle of the Hockey Gladiators was held over the weekend. For full results, click here. I have not written anything on this because I have been collecting thoughts, but like Deep throat, it is time for the silence to break.

When this tourney was first announced, I thought it would be a great idea. Who wouldn’t want to see the top enforcers in the world battle it out for supremacy? I was thinking I’d head to Minnesota and see the event first hand. Well, over the ensuing months, this project had more problems than you could shake a stick at. They lost buildings, fighters, and along the way the lost my interest as well. From what I understand, one of the reasons the organizers were losing building permits, is because local officials didn’t want a bunch of drunks watching guys slug it out, and then trying to slug it out themselves. A legitimate concern, but what is the difference between a boxing match, or a kickboxing event? Why more concern over hockey fights? Promoters said, "Nah, you got nothing to worry about, we’ll be well behaved." I had hoped they were right, and they didn’t give people that are against hockey fights, any ammunition to throw at us goon loving bunch.

From what I understand, about 2,000 people showed for the event in an arena that holds about 6,000. Link Gaetz, the favorite to win it all, was handed his lunch in the first round. After the event was over, apparently fights broke out all over the arena. The web cast didn’t work properly either, as it kept freezing up. The combatants were required to wear gloves, and helmets had to stay on. Doesn’t sound like much of a "hockey" fight to me.

It sounds to me like this event, from start to finish, was a joke. I love a good hockey fight as much as the next guy, but to me, a fight is when two guys square off, drop their gloves, and have at it. It isn’t two guys in a controlled area of ice, wearing gloves, slugging it out for two minutes. That is a street fight on ice, and if I wanted to watch that, I’d go rent an UFC video. I am not a prude when it comes to violence in hockey, it is the violence and speed that attracts me to it, I just don’t want an event like this to come back and haunt the game of hockey. I don’t want some yahoo to point to an "event" like the Gladiators, with its poor on ice product, and bad behavior in the stands, as a reason for fighting to be banned forever. Fighting is already dying off, and with the new CBA in the NHL, I feel it will all but be eliminated very soon. There may be nothing us fight fans can do or say about it, but let’s not let the people that drive fights from our beloved game point to the Gladiators as the reason why. 

Sometimes when the boys drop the mitts and square off, it’s Shakespearean in scope - a chivalrous enforcer coming to the aid of an abused teammate. But as we all know, sometimes the goonery can be malicious, nasty and unwarranted. CBC Sports recently ranked their 10 most noteable dispicable hockey hits:

• #1 Retaliatory hit begets All-Star Game
• #2 Rocket" Richard’s tomahawk & the ensuing riot
• #3 Wayne Maki fractures Ted Green’s skull
• #4 Bobby Clarke’s Summit Series chop
• #5 Maloney crowns Glennie; crown sticks it to Maloney
• #6 The night the lights went out
• #7 Hunter ends Turgeon’s playoff run
• #8 Jeff Kugel runs wild in OHL game
• #9 Gary Suter ruins Paul Kariya’s Olympics
• #10 The Marty McSorley trial
• #11 Todd Bertuzzi’s sucker on Steve Moore. (Thanks to Greg from Puck Update for keeping us honest.)

Here’s hoping nobody gets seriously injured this year, as there are many proponents of a completely fight-free game waiting in the wings to slap down a host of new rules.

After a very rough Friday night, I read a very interesting article on ESPN.com written by Scott Burnside. I think Mr. Burnside makes a few good points regarding enforcers’ roles in the new NHL. It has been my fear that with the new CBA, roster spots are going to be a lot more valuable then they once were, and teams are going to have to think long and hard about how to fill them. Do you want to spend the 450K on a Kip Brennan in Anaheim, who really only brings one thing to the table, or do you spend that cash on a guy that can play a little bit, but can also defend himself?

I love hockey. I love a good hockey fight. In my opinion carrying a guy that can fight is as important as carrying a guy that can score. Even if they never see the ice, or get a couple of shifts a game, I think it keeps the opposition honest. I have seen first hand what the lack of an enforcer can mean to a team. Lowell hasn’t had a tough guy willing to fight in several years. Opposing teams know when they come into the Tsongas; they get a night off from fighting, and a green light to start running around. It seems in the new NHL, GM’s are counting on the game being faster, and wide open. I think rosters are going to be filled with more skilled players, and the resident "tough guy" will be a guy that can skate, but also can defend himself if need be. Will this give opposing teams the green light to start taking liberties with other guys?

Near the end of the ESPN article, Burnside cites the Lightning as having won the Cup, with no real enforcer to speak of. Interestingly, Tampa Bay signed 6′7" Monster Mitch Fritz in the off season. Here we have the very definition of a tough guy. A guy that brings one thing to the table, and only one: Fighting. There is no way Fritz can play at the NHL level. The man can not skate. So why sign him? I wonder if the true tough guys in hockey today will be kept on ice, no pun intended, in the AHL, and get the call if they are expecting a real grudge match type victory. Is this the beginning of enforcers as a Carnival Side show?

My friends and I have been discussing at length our predictions for the NHL’s return to North Station. It’s obviously been an incredible year for sports in this city. Will Hockey return with a slapshot, or be overshadowed by home runs and field goals? Bruins owner Jeremy Jacobs is beyond optimistic: "We are looking at increased interest in Boston over what we had historically and we should surpass where we were two years ago in attendance.” Does that mean I’ll no longer be able to buy $30 nosebleeds and then sneak down to the club section? Only time will tell.

The general concensus here at GoonBlog is along the same lines. Although Boston’s other pro sports teams dominated in 2004, and hockey has been off the radar for many moons, there’s still a fanatical Bruins fanbase here that you’d need a simultaneous anthrax/radiation scare to keep away from the rink. And even that is a big ‘maybe’. Interest is going to surpass that of 2003 by leaps and bounds, and the team’s chances are looking up every day. I want to live in a hockey town again!

Well, I was thinking Trevor Gillies might get a shot in Anaheim, but it looks like he’s going to have to compete with Kip Brennan now.  I was thinking that with Gillies getting dealt out there earlier in the week, they were going to roll the dice on Trevor being able to stay at the NHL level, and worst case, they would have a very capable young man protecting farm hands in Portland. Now it would seem the Ducks are looking to have a couple of Heavies slug it out in camp for the role in the show. Kip Brennan is no stranger to the AHL either, having racked up 854 PIMS in 152 Games in the American League. I am not sure they will be able to keep both guys, and Kip would appear to be the favorite to stay in the NHL, but it sure will be an interesting Camp.

C-A-N-A-D-A - Have you ever seen a magnetic hill?
C-A-N-A-D-A - Or a lady on a dollar bill?
C-A-N-A-D-A - Betcha never seen the autumn fall.
In Canada, we get to see them all. - Stompin Tom Connors

We can now add a pick-up game of pond hockey to the list of unconventional things you’ll find on Canadian currency (A lady? What are you - nuts?). I returned to the homeland this past weekend for the first time in a while, and noticed this lovely tableau on the latest finskis:

In between frantic visits to the Tim Horton’s in Gananoque, and the poutine producing chipwagons of Portland, I got to flash a little of the local lucre. Since I can’t exactly picture lacrosse on the fiver, and it’s a vast improvement over the old version, I thought I’d point it out to the GoonSquad. But apparently some folks don’t like the new design, especially since it’s much harder to turn Sir Wilfred Laurier into Spock. I wish I were kidding. Regardless, it still buys a whackload of TimBits.

HockeyFights.com’s VodkaFish has just posted his collection of the best fight videos of the 2003-2004 season - including: Brown vs. Vandermeer, Simon vs. McNeill, Fedoruk vs. Lessard and several more. You can download them and watch morbidly transfixed again and again! He’s also enabled voting, so you can ‘big up’ your preferred pugilists. Well done, VF. We’ll be watching. Unhealthily.

Well, it looks like the Gillies Brothers won’t get a chance to play together after all. Trevor got dealt to the Ducks today. If he stays in Portland, and I suspect he will, we Lowell fans will still get to see him in action. Trevor is a good kid, and I hope he cracks the line up in Anaheim.

Rough weekend boys. Friday I went to dinner and drank too much, Saturday me and MOL went to the Peelers, and drank too much. Sunday was the Crue at Verizon. I tried to drink too much, but the brew was shut off right as soon as the show started. Makes sense with Motley Crue I guess. The Crue was a great show by the way. I was standing in the middle of the Blue Line closest to the entrance of the Verizon Wireless Arena in Manchester. Great show. Being in the building really made me look forward to the upcoming season.

I heard a rumor that PJ Stock had to call it quits due to vision problems. It’s strange, because at the Crue, I was looking around scouting out some seats that might be good for hockey, when I thought to myself, "Hey Self, Wouldn’t Stocker look good in a Lockmonster Uniform?" I answered, "Yes."  Point being, when PJ Stock was in Boston, he was a total fan favorite, a guy that was always willing to go with anyone. He had two great fights with Stephen Peat, a dandy with Reed Low, and a couple of Donnybrooks with Eric Boulton. He may not have won them all, but he never backed down from anyone. I think the way the Bruins treated him was pretty crappy. They signed him to a two year deal, then sent him to Providence, and from there, loaned him to Philadelphia. I always enjoyed PJ’s play, and he will be missed.

I wonder if Trevor and Nathan Gillies are going to have to fight each other in camp? I saw Nathan in Danbury last year when he was with Elmira. He’s not a bad hockey player at all. I think he has more hockey skill than Trevor does, or ever will for that matter, but you have to give the nod to Trevor in the fisticuffs department. I do know that last season when Bridgeport gave Nathan a shot at the end of the season he had a Gordie Howe Hat Trick in his first game. He sure seems willing to prove himself at the next level. Good for Nathan, I hope he makes the team.

Busy weekend on tap. Nothing tonight, but I was thinking of taking in some Ballet Saturday, Canadian Style of course, then Motley Crue on Sunday night! I saw those guys in March in Boston, and it was a great show. I am looking forward to some brew, and the Crue! Other than that, I’ll be in and out here, so stay tuned. Have a good weekend everyone!