Milan’s Maddening Misadventure

During a season that would have made a wounded turtle look spry, Lucic only managed 7 goals, 12 assists, and 19 points from 77 games with the Calgary Flames in 2022-23. But this year he’s been off to a better than decent start, and who’s counting? (We all are, Milan. We all are.) So this recent slapshot to the friggin’ tootsie, when everything was going so well, is just a goddamned insult to injury.

Well, if we want to get technical, it’s an… “injury to injury“? I’ll have to check my style guide and get back to this fascinating piece of wordplay. But I can tell you now for nothing – that I’m extremely disappointed, Jakub Lauko (and his eye) is probably also disappointed that Jesper Boqvist has been summoned up from Providence. Everybody is disappointed. Except Jesper.

But, please, do not misunderstand me in the meantime – Goonblog.com is 100% pro-Milan Lucic, and every one of us is thrilled he’s back in Boston. I was planning to drive down to Beantown for the 11/2 game against Toronto in hopes he’d be squaring off with Ryan Reaves. But I hadn’t gotten tickets yet, and now that the big boy is out for at least 2 weeks I’m far less interested in making the trip. As much as I love getting shit-hammered at The Harp, I have my priorities and am perfectly capable of getting shit-hammered in Vermont, thank you very much.

Milan Lucic’s Injury – How? Why? WHY NOW?!

Journey back with me that fateful Saturday night joust against the Los Angeles Kings. Lucic, still pretty froggy for a 35-year-old, channeled his inner superhero when leaping in front of a speeding puck. In the process, he sustained an injury that was somewhat less heroic and more, well, excruciatingly painful. Nevertheless, like an unstoppable force happy to be back in the gold and black, he played on, notching an assist in his 12 minutes and 15 seconds on the ice before the Bruins clinched the victory with a 4-2 tally.

So far, the aftermath has seen him benched for subsequent games against the Ducks and the Blackhawks. And Montgomery has confirmed the grim prognosis – that Lucic is on the injured list for a while. At least 2 weeks as of the last update.

Before the catastrophe, Lucic had been coasting with a not-too-shabby two assists across four games. He was clocking a 0.5 point per game pace, something he hasn’t achieved since the Paleozoic era (or the 2016-17 season for the non-history buffs). Mind you, this is a smaller sample size than the number of people who actually enjoy listening to New Kids on the Block, but many of us were excited. Many of us feel like they’ve just had the return of old time hockey rug pulled right out from under them. And, true story, I was once mistaken for Jordan Knight by a landscaper my parents hired.

Many hockey fans feel, at this stage of his rough-and-tumble career, that Milan Lucic deserves everything he gets. And those hockey fans can fuck right off. We wish you a speedy recovery, bud, and look forward to watching you knock heads for a few years yet to come.